 Cats & Dogs:
The Revenge of Kitty Galore
Movie Review
By Rick Grant B Rated G
This is a dog-gone entertaining movie. A feast of talking cats and dogs off on a special mission with some dogs and the cats of MEOW to foil Kitty Galore’s crazed plot to destroy humanity. It’s the age old battle between cats and dogs, with a twist.
In this caper, the cats of MEOW work with the canine special agents. And during their mission they drag along a wise-cracking pigeon named Seamus voiced by Katt Williams.
Directed by Bard Peyton with Chris O’Donnell starring as Diggs’ (James Marsden) police handler. When poor Diggs screws up a bust that ends up blowing up a building, he is relieved of duty and sent back to the kennel. His handler is crushed and vows to bust him out.
Meanwhile a secret dog spy agency recruits Diggs and rescues him form the slammer. Diggs partners up with Butch (Nick Nolte) a grumpy veteran agent. But one thing is in Diggs’ favor, he hates cats. So his motivation is strong to kick Kitty Galore’s ass.
Ah yes, in a twist of fate, Diggs is forced to work with cats from MEOW to bring down Kitty Galore, whose diabolical plan is coming close to fruition. Diggs swallows his pride to team up with kitty Catherine (Christina Applegate) who, after spending time with Diggs, actually forms a bond with him. Ye gad, it’s a cat/dog alliance based on the old adage, the enemy of my enemy is my friend.
Butch unveils his portable flying jet that take him to Kitty Galore’s secret location inside an Airstream trailer belonging to a circus performer. It’s a canine plus feline adventure based on a James Bond movie with a character like Jaws, only he is a ruffled looking cat.
Kitty Galore (Bette Midler) is a hairless cat with a freaky laugh. She lost her hair by being thrown into a vat of hair remover. Enter a cat that is held in a special cell like Hannibal Lecter. He escapes to continue his crime spree.
Yes, there is plenty of dramatic elements with the CGI effects and the mouth morphing software working splendidly. The motley crew of cats and dogs are artfully manipulated so that the audience fully accepts that the talking animals are real.
There was a 2001 film titled “Cats & Dogs” which set the stage for this sequel. But it doesn’t matter if the viewer didn’t see the original, this film has enough original elements to stand on its own.
The hip film references to “Sunset Boulevard” and “The Silence of the Lambs will please the adult film buffs in the audience. But, Diggs is the real star with that darn pigeon, Seamus stealing his scenes.
The combination of real actors and voice overs with the talking animals works great to create the dramatic scenes of daring do. Bette Midler’s voice-over of Kitty Galore is wickedly dark as she plots to send out a sound that will make all dogs go crazy.
Even though this film is touted as a kids movie, parents will love it. It’s got the whole package of a well written script and playing on moviegoers’ love of cats and dogs, and a great villain. It’s perfect summer fun.
Back to top
 Salt
Movie Review
By Rick Grant B+ Rated PG-13 100 min
It’s no secret that after the cold war and the Soviet Union collapsed, Russia was still run by ex-KGB agents who believed in having spies living among us in the U.S. With the recent spy bust of a cadre of sleeper spies living in suburbia, obviously, we can’t trust the Russians.
This fast paced action film, starring Angelina Jolie as Russian speaking CIA Agent Evelyn Salt, plays to that mistrust. So, the premise, although far fetched, is plausible. The film gives Jolie a chance to kick ass and fire modern assault weapons. Fasten your seat belts, this is a rocket ride through Hades.
Dating back to the cold war, Salt was specially trained as a sleeper agent and sent to live in America. Here she fell in love with a biologist, married him, and got a job with the CIA.
One day a Russian spy walks into the CIA and claims that Salt is a Russian spy while she’s in the control room. This sets off a chain of events that sends Salt running away. The audience never knows where her loyalties lie until later in the film.
Meanwhile, all hell breaks loose as her colleague and friend, Ted Winter (Liev Schreiber) wonders what the hell Salt is doing. He still believes she is loyal to the United States. But, why is she running if she is innocent of the charge of being a spy?
Ted’s colleagues have to assume she is a threat and use all their resources to track Salt down. However, they had no idea how well trained she was until she starts using her hidden talents to avoid capture at every turn.
The chase action is non-stop as Salt puts her commando training to good use. But for what purpose? Ah yes, this is the nagging question that drives the action, as Salt is a one woman army, thinking on her feet and improvising when cornered.
This is a choice role for Jolie who uses her physical prowess and acting talent to string the audience along on her unknown quest to find and protect her husband, who is caught in the middle. Yes, not only is Jolie gorgeous, she does action really well.
Viewers learn some of her background by the fleeting flashbacks, although they seem out of place as the action never lets up. Her friend Ted seems to have come to the conclusion that Salt has betrayed her country and the CIA. But he’s still concerned for her safety.
The walk-in spy had foretold the upcoming plot to kill the Russian president. Now the CIA must stop Salt from carrying out the mission. So, Salt is one hot fugitive with every law enforcement agency that exists on her tail. This plays out in many exciting stunts and explosions.
The big question for the audience is: Where are Salt’s loyalties? Is she a double agent–a Russian operative, or still working for the CIA. This keeps the adrenaline pumping and the audience on the edge of their seats as the action plays out.
Eventually, Salt is captured. Hey, they don’t keep her long before she uses some brilliant method to escape. This broad is a slippery she-devil. As the picture rolls to the climatic scenes, viewers are still wondering “who is Salt?” Well, she’s superwoman in the field and can take a hell of a lot of physical abuse. She beats the be jesus out of an army of Secret Service agents, police, CIA agents, and anyone else that gets in her way.
Directed by Phillip Noyce, who orchestrated the stunts and action with precise timing. This picture is a perfect fix for adrenaline junkies and action movie fans. I was excited by the action and intrigued by trying to figure out where the story was going. In the end, all story elements are tied together with a final twist at the end.
Back to top
 Inception
Movie Review
By Rick Grant A Rated PG-13 148 min
Filmmaker Christopher Nolan worked on this script for ten years. The result is a complicated scenario of mind-blowing situations and special effects, featuring a multi-layered story line. Basically, the story is about a team of industrial spies who developed technology to invade CEO’s dreams to steal their secrets. Dom Cobb (Leonardo DeCaprio) is the team leader.
The team is approached by an Asian billionaire, Saito (Ken Watanabe) who will pay a fortune to Cobb’s team if they can invade a rival, Robert Fischer, Jr’s. (Cillian Murphy) dreams and implant an idea so deep in his subconscious, he’ll think he came up with it. This new method is called inception.
Of course, the idea is a Trojan Horse and will be his downfall. Cobb knows about inception and has tested it. But it’s dangerous and the method is fraught with unknown dangers.
Since Cobb is a fugitive, Saito agrees that, as part of the deal, he will pave the way for him to return to the United States a free man to see his kids. His wife died under mysterious circumstances. But his father-in-law and mentor, played by Michael Caine, is taking care of them.
With Nolan’s sensational special effects and his multi-layered script, this movie is incredibly engaging. Viewers may not fully understand the complexity of the script, but they will talk about this film many days after seeing it. One thing to know, when the team is in a mark’s dreams, the world that they have created is full of projections that could be a problem.
In this regard, the movie is reminiscent of “The Matrix.” In that movie, the protagonist moved around in a virtual world created to appease the humans hooked up to pods to drain their life-energy like human batteries, feeding the machines.
To pull off his mission deep inside Fischer’s subconscious brain, Cobb recruits a new “architect”-- a genius level architectural student, Ariane (Ellen Page) to join the team. She’s scary smart and catches on quickly. Her curiosity leads her inside Cobb’s troubled dream state where she learns his secrets, which could bleed into their dream invasion and sabotage the mission.
Cobb’s right hand man is Arthur (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) who works various angles to coordinate the mission into a well timed operation. Cobb also recruits famous con-man and thief, Eames (Tom Hardy) and chemist Yusuf (Dileep Rao). Saito insists on joining the team despite Cobb’s advice against it.
Nolan’s brilliant screenplay takes the viewers on a magical journey inside of Fischer’s various levels of consciousness. There, they encounter Fischer’s dream security team, projections implanted there to prevent his secrets from being stolen. It’s a projection army that harasses the team with small arms firepower, which Cobb never expected.
As the team goes deeper into the layers of Fischer’s unconscious, there are other unexpected surprises. At times, it’s difficult to figure out just what reality is being presented.
Nolan cleverly strings the viewers along with false leads and tangents to the main story as the layers of the dream assault fall in place. If the viewer has accepted Nolan’s premise that the team is operating deep inside Fischer’s subconscious dream state, then the zero gravity fights and the precise timing of the caper make perfect sense.
Nolan created vast dream worlds where, like in any dreams, strange things happen. These dream worlds can collapse if the team strays off course. However, viewers will enjoy the vast splendor of the Nolan’s surrealistic worlds.
As Cobb’s team ventures into uncharted dream layers, they’re resolve is tested. If they die in these deep layers they could be trapped in limbo and an artificial world for years. Cobb’s own dream reality bleeds into the team’s plans which threatens the mission.
Nolan’s complex, intricately woven script, (a masterpiece) special effects, and a stellar cast make this film the best movie of the summer. It’s one of the most original films ever to be released–on a par with “Blade Runner” and “Apocalypse Now.” It’s imaginative, engrossing, and thought provoking. In other words, it has the prerequisites to make it a great classic movie and a blockbuster as well.
Back to top
 The Sorcerer’s Apprentice
Movie Review
By Rick Grant B Rated PG
This film is the third collaboration between Nicolas Cage and director Jon Turtletaub –“National Treasure” 1&2. The movie co-stars Jay Baruchel as Dave, a science geek who attends NYU.
With Jerry Bruckheimer’s stamp of audience acceptance, this fantasy story was a safe bet for Walt Disney Pictures. In these tough economic times, trust Bruckheimer to have his finger on the pulse of what gets moviegoers excited enough to leave the comfort of their homes and travel to the nearest cineplex to see a movie.
The story is an old folk tale. And yes, we all remember the “Sorcerer’s Apprentice” segment of “Fantasia,” with Mickey Mouse directing the brooms. In this modern interpretation, there is a funny reference to that segment, with Dave directing mops and brooms inside his Tesla arc lab.
Nicolas Cage plays Balthazar, an ancient sorcerer who has his nemesis, Horvath (Alfred Molina) confined in a Russian nesting doll for over ten years. Balthazar lives in dread fear that Horvath will escape and unleash the “rising,” launched by an evil witch, Morgana (Alice Krige) who will bring to life all the evil spirits in the world to destroy the Earth as we know it.
The pairing of the immortal sorcerer and his apprentice, a nerdy guy who would seem the most unlikely person to be chosen as the sorcerer’s apprentice, is an accommodation to Jay Baruchel’s acting style. He is the quintessential underdog, but he harbors undiscovered sorcery talents that Balthazar is able to nurture and eventually bring out.
Director Turtletaub’s spectacular scenes explode with CGI effects and non-stop action. For the most part, all this wizardry is wildly entertaining as Horvath escapes and wreaks havoc on Balthazar and Dave. That darn nesting egg is rocking and rolling.
The classic battle between good and evil drives this scenario. And, since Bruckheimer produced the film, he demands the obligatory car chases through NYC. As Balthazar can change his car to any high performance street rod that pops into his mind, it makes for an interesting duel of cars racing on the streets of Manhattan.
In this fantasy context, anything goes and the laws of physics go out the window. Still, the special effects are well done, especially the plasma balls that Dave shoots at the bad guys.
The kid and his mentor bond, but Balthazar discourages Dave’s romance with Becky (Teresa Palmer). However, Dave is driven by his hormones and love for Becky, who he takes into his confidence admitting he is a sorcerer. Funny, she accepts his explanation for the weird occurrences in his Tesla lab, like the out of control mops. He even asks for her help in a big scene.
Cage seems to love playing these bigger than life characters. His portrayal of Balthazar, with his long hair, trench coat, and hat is convincingly authentic, given that viewers suspend their disbelief in immortal sorcerers.
Ah yes, this film is pure fantasy entertainment. It’s typical of the popular movies in today’s world. The proliferation of 3D and IMAX has upped the ante on special effects movies. Moviegoers want a high wow factor to plunk down their hard earned money to see a movie. And producers such as Jerry Bruckheimer are hip to this reality.
Overall, this is an exciting family movie that will do well at the box office.
Back to top
 Twilight Saga: Eclipse
Movie Review
By Rick Grant C Rated PG-13 124 min
This teenage fantasy saga drags on for its 124 minutes with sophomoric dialogue designed to titillate the adolescent female brain. For those of us used to the hot sexy lovemaking, and black humor of “True Blood” on HBO, this film saga comes off as flaccid teen-scene dribble.
The little girls screams are predictable when Taylor Lautner as Jacob Black appears on screen without his shirt, showing off his six-pack abs and brooding shape shifter looks. The “Twilight” fans are unanimous in favoring Jacob over Edward.
In this third episode of “Twilight”, Bella Swan (Kristen Stewart) is torn between two suitors–her vampire boyfriend, Edward (Robert Pattinson) and Jacob–a shape shifting werewolf. Stewart is properly pouty and annoying portraying Bella.
Soulless immortal Edward pledges his love if she’ll marry him, then he’ll turn her. Sadly for Bella, premarital sex is out because he worries about vampire to human sex could be dangerous. Ah, what a letdown.
In contrast, “True Blood” viewers know that vampire to human sex is super hot-- a cosmic experience-- like a LSD trip. But no, this schlock is aimed at teenage girls. Rest assured, there is no simulated sex in this movie, so parents can breathe a sigh of relief.
However, there is a lot of banal dialogue about love and what Bella “really wants” after her high school graduation. Hey, what about college? At least her dad is wise to say, “get some distance from Edward.” Hello, he’s a vampire and is not going anywhere.
On the other hand, Jacob has pledged his love and stated, unequivocally, that his love will be hotter than Edward’s cold passion. Poor Bella, she’s caught between two other worldly lifestyles.
Ah yes, meanwhile, as the blithering dialogue drones on, there is a war brewing between the “new borns,” who are recently turned vampires who are wildly ravenous for blood. They are being manipulated as a tool for revenge from the ruling council of vampires into settling scores with their vampire enemies.
It takes an excruciating length of time to get to that showdown, the centerpiece of the film. But, when it finally comes it doesn’t last nearly long enough. Then it’s back the boring Edward, Bella, and Jacob love triangle.
Yes, as unlikely as it seems, Bella is a virgin who seems to favor Edward’s immortal blood sucking life to Jacob’s pack of shirtless shape shifters who live in a cabin in the woods with an old Indian chief.
But wait, she’s a fickle little twit. Jacob offers hot human styled love. In real life, wouldn’t she have sex with both Edward and Jacob to help her decide her own fate? What a pill.
After all the talk about love and Bella’s “big decision,” the smack-down in the woods finally happens to wake up the adults in the audience. Yeah, those ”new borns” can kick ass. But so can the trained vampires with the assistance of the werewolves. Those hairy beasts can do some damage of their own.
Oh the humanity, Bella is faced with this crushing choice. Really, this teeny-weenie should get a life and an education. There will be plenty of vampires and shape shifters to bang after college. Ah yes, but this is what teenage girls think about more than anything else. So, we have the “Twilight Saga” to keep them stimulated but chaste. Ha! Dream on parents.
Back to top
 Grown Ups
Movie Review
By Rick Grant C- Rated PG-13 102 min
Adam Sandler is the king of lowball comedy which at times works, depending on the script. However, this Sandler production through his own company Happy Madison Productions, sinks to new lows of cheap laughs.
The endless pratfalls and slapstick wear thin from the beginning. Throw in some fat jokes aimed at Kevin James’ character Eric Lamonsoff, and the film falls below even Sandler’s low standard.
Frankly, how Sandler became a big player in Hollywood with little talent is a mystery to me. But, his pictures make money, so that’s all that matters in La La Land. He cornered the stupid moviegoers’ market.
This film is part of Hollywood’s do more with less mantra. Hire a bunch of big names, gather them at a lake cabin with the funeral of their coach as an excuse, and it’s a semi-vacation for the cast.
The group’s claim to fame was years ago, when the they were in junior high, they were part of a winning basketball team coached by the now deceased coach. Today, they’re grown ups. (Duh)
Sandler’s character Lenny Feder is a big shot Hollywood agent with his beautiful trophy wife Roxanne.(Selma Hayek Pinault). She’s a fashion designer. The kids are typical spoiled brats used to the high life.
Each character has his own eccentric baggage that the other characters can joke about. Eric’ (James) wife is still breast feeding her kid at 5 years old. Kurt (Chris Rock) is married to a white woman who is very pregnant. His mom, a stereotypical large black woman, is always belittling Eric.
Marcus (David Spade) at 38, is still trying to pull off the single stoner guy who is crawling with chicks. Rob (Rob Schneider) is married to a vulgar aging flower child and is into the occult. This is played as a sick joke which is not funny.
In this Sandler film, people fall down, get arrows through their feet, fall into dog poop, and Eric takes a rope to swing into the lake and comes back to slam into a tree. Ha, ha. Sadly, that is as good as this movie gets.
The kids are nerve wracking, the adults act worse than their kids, and a tall babe shakes her ass in front of the men. This leads me to the conclusion that a monkey wrote this script. Oh, Sandler wrote it, which explains a lot.
Clearly, Sandler was playing it safe to sell this crap. People laugh at lowball humor as a knee jerk reaction, not because it’s necessarily funny. The ensemble cast comedies are the cotton candy of filmmaking. Every summer a fuselage of these vacation films hit the cineplexes.
The truth is: Sandler’s comedies lack subtlety. Remarkably, sometimes it works in a base way to elicit real laughs. With the cast and a bunch of kids on the set, with the lake and large airy cabin as the center piece of the location, there is not much variety in the presentation.
Sandler made this film with Dennis Dugan directing. Sandler is on-set with his real life buddies ogling the babe or pissing off a boat. The solid laughs don’t exist. As the silliness drones on, the viewer prays that this boring dribble will end. Even the dog’s turkey-like bark gets old after it’s used many times to fill in the dead air.
Back to top
 Karate Kid
Movie Review
By Rick Grant B Rated PG
When Hollywood goes on a cost cutting binge, producers refuse to pay writers for original screenplays. To hedge their bets, they remake classic films for a new generation of moviegoers.
Lately, remake fever has hit the movie studios with a vengeance. Then they tack on 3D, and presto, it’s a sure thing. Thankfully, “Karate Kid: (Next Generation) is not in 3D, which I consider a cheap gimmick.
Surprisingly, this remake of the 1984 film is better than the original. Jaden Smith plays Dre Parker whose mother, Sherry (Taraji P. Henson) accepts a job in China and she and Dre travel 13 hours to the other side of the world.
Dre has a hard time adjusting to life in a strange foreign land. On the basketball court, Dre befriends a cute girl which angers a group of Chinese bullies. Consequently, Dre gets his ass kicked by these trained kung-fu thugs.
Jackie Chan, who has been lobbying to play a serious role, gets his chance as Mr. Han, a lowly maintenance man for the apartment complex where Dre and his mom live. Ah, but Mr. Han, who lost his family in a car accident, is secretly a kung-fu master who befriends Dre.
Sure, anyone knows where this story is going, but the exotic location inside China, the quality production values, and a stellar cast create an exciting milieu for viewing this remake. Jaden Smith is a truly talented actor who is learning his lessons well and performs the role of Dre with deep insight into the character.
Small for his age, Dre is faced with bigger, tougher bullies who hate foreigners in their country. The also hate the fact that he charmed a musically gifted Chinese girl to hang out with him. So, Dre tries to avoid the bullies but his fear is affecting his school work.
Enter the dragon, so to speak. Master Han takes Dre under his wing and teaches him kung-fu, not to win fights, but to give him confidence. Dre and Han go to the karate school where the master teaches the bullies to show no mercy.
Han convinces the master to agree to have his students leave Dre alone while he trains him for a big tournament where Dre can show off his karate skills. (And viewers know that Dre wants to get revenge on those bullies.)
Oh yeah, the big showdown is coming as Dre is put through the wringer with his master teaching him the zen philosophy of kung fu as well as the fight discipline. As Dre progresses, Han takes him to the mountain where kung-fu originated. There Dre sees things that leave him mesmerized. It’s then that he realizes that there is much more to the martial arts than fighting.
Skillfully directed by Harald Zwart, who takes the time to present the wide vistas of China and the Great Wall as backdrops to the story. The original version was directed by John Avidsen, who directed “Rocky.”
Interestingly, there is a striking difference in style and tone between the two filmmakers, who both delivered wildly entertaining films. Zwart’s verison immerses the audience in the culture of China. Viva la difference.
The film shows a bustling modern country with horrendous traffic jams and thick ozone pollution. Zwart made it a point to show just how many foreigners are living in China, many of whom are Americans. Well, they can’t find jobs here, so why not go to China, except for its oppressive, communist government.
This film could inspire a new generation of young martial arts enthusiasts which is good news for local karate studios.
Back to top
 Toy Story 3
Movie Review
By Rick Grant B+ Rated G 103 min
After 2 “Toy Storys” the toys and story could have been stale and dated. In fact, my expectations were low going into the screening. Surprise! I was delighted by the now dated toys coming alive again with distinctive characters uttering funny dialogue.
Stated differently, “Toy Story 3" has not lost its luster and endearing characterizations. Of course, now it’s in 3D (whoop) which maybe added some excitement.
However, the screenplay by director, Lee Unkrich, John Lasseter, Andrew Stanton, and Darla K. Anders breathes new life into these adorable characters. The voice over cast stays true to the established personalities adding their funny spin on the fantastic plastic group.
The story is set 10 years after the last episode. Andy is off to college and the fate of the toy society is at risk. They are hoping he will store them in the attic and not throw them to the curb to be taken to the dump and ground up into recycled plastic. Donating the toys to another kid or day care center could be other alternatives. .
Woody is devastated by the change. He wants to stay with Andy and go to college with him. But, the other toys convince him this is not an option. How would it look for a college student to have a toy in his dorm room. So, the attic seems like a nice alternative. At least they would all be together.
After some odd circumstances the gang ends up in a day care center and put in a room where hyper kids come in and torture them. The place has ominous vibes and is run by a teddy bear, Lotso,(Ned Beatty) who doesn’t plan to let anyone leave. The toy story group is stuck there but Woody has a plan to break out of this hell hole.
Seeing this 3rd episode of the Toy Story franchise is like reuniting with old friends who are still funny. Mr Potato Head( voiced by Don Rickles) is hilarious and Estelle Harris makes Mrs. Potato Head come alive again with her rough-tough personality. Her eye can see when it is not attached, which comes in handy in this episode.
Buzz Lightyear almost steals the movie when he is switched to his Spanish mode and falls for Jessie. But as usual, he is there to help rescue the toys from Lotso’s prison after he is reset. This is when he goes to Spanish mode by mistake.
It’s all great fun to join the toys again for this latest adventure, which is much more complicated than previous stories. When the wild toddlers are turned loose on the toys they are beaten up pretty bad. Woody complains but Lotso tell him they all had to endure this phase of their stay at the center before moving on to a more age appropriate room.
Barbie is back and finds true love with the center’s self absorbed Ken who is too busy loving himself to share that love with Barbie. Ken sides with the center’s Lotso gang but Barbie joins the other s trying to escape the dreaded prison. Each character has their moments as well as a group. So we can remember just how enjoyable they are as animated characters.
Pixar has come a long way since the original Toy Story put them on the Hollywood A-list. They developed a smooth style of CGI that is true to the past but uses the newer time saving techniques, without sacrificing quality. The Pixar filmography is second to none in the animation field. But it’s their attention to detail and character development that makes them the standard to emulate.
Back to top
 Sex and the City 2
Movie Review
By Rick Grant B Rated R 146 min
Writer/director, Michael Patrick King’s slant on this second “Sex...” movie deals with women in the dreaded transition into post menopausal life. Unrealistically, the gals live in a fairytale world of wealth and fashion, far removed from the real world. But that’s why women and men love this ensemble–they represent a wish-fulfillment fantasy with humor and glamour. It’s pure escapist fantasy.
In Carrie’s (Sarah Jessica Parker) case it’s a world where she is trying to redefine marriage to Mr. Big (Ken Noth). Interestingly, Noth’s character is typical of the happily married man. He is completely comfortable at home, relaxing on the couch, watching TV after a hard day wrestling with the stock market. He’s done the night-life scene, and now he’s settled down and content.
In contrast, Carrie fears the routine of married life will get boring and lack the spark of their carefree pre-marriage relationship. So, she complains to Big that since they have no children, they can experiment with a different style of marriage that avoids routine.
Since Carrie couldn’t sell her apartment, she keeps it and she asks Big if she can go there for a few days to write. He’s fine with that. Then when she returns, he suggests that they both take two days a week to be alone in the apartment.
Carrie reads way too much into his idea, but agrees. Problem solved? Not necessarily. The question is: Can Carrie have her cake and eat it too? Well, after a journey to the Middle East, that cake might taste stale.
Samantha (Kim Cattrall) is suffering the full effects of menopause but she is taking hormones and using special creams recommended by a Suzanne Somers’ diet book to offset the symtoms. She is determined to not let her hot flashes get in the way of her exciting sex life, which has slowed down recently. Ah yes, gravity is a cruel force of nature.
But when Samatha is shopping for a new gown to attend the marriage of the gals’ gay pals, the sales clerk says the dress she chose is too young for her. Undaunted, Samantha wears the dress to the wedding and, (gasp) Miley Cyrus shows up with the same gown. Ouch! (Notice that now, “Miley Cyrus” is used as a curse word.)
Despite their hectic lives, the gals get together and the wedding of their gay best friends is a chance to catch up. The lavish wedding is over-the-top gay with a gay men’s chorus and non-other than Liza Minnelli starring in a song and dance number.
The segment is funny and wildy entertaining.
Charlotte (Kristin Davis) is not handling the stress of motherhood well, and her whiny kids are driving her crazy. Her main worry, though, is her Irish Nanny who flops around with no bra tempting her husband.
Miranda (Cynthia Nixon) hates her job at a law firm whose senior partner doesn’t recognize her contribution to the firm. Her boss rudely cuts her off at meetings by putting his hand in front of her face. She’s’ definitely needs of a break.
Fortuitous circumstances happen to allow the gals to go on an all expense paid trip to Abu Dhabi in the United Arab Emirates as guest of the king, who likes Samantha.
The gals have seen luxury before, but nothing like their accommodations at this 5 star Abu Dhabi hotel. They each have a luxury car and driver, a butler and a magnificent suite of rooms with their own bars. Every wish is their butler’s command.
This main segment in Abu Dhabi helps the gals unwind. In a unbelievable coincidence, Carrie bumps into her ex-boyfriend, Aiden (John Corbett), who is doing business in the UAE. What are the odds? Great, it’s written in the script.
The gay wedding and the trip to UAE are a wonderful escape for the audience. Yes, the gals have gotten older, but they’re still fashion plates, strutting their stuff as sexy broads. The movie is a wild ride being with these flamboyant gals off on another adventure.
Back to top
 Prince of Persia: Sands of Time
Movie Review
By Rick Grant C Rated PG-13 116 min
Based on a video game, this film could be called ”Indiana Jones with Swords.” Director, Mike Newell’s overblown interpretation of video game/screenwriter Jordan Lechner’s script assumes that the viewers of this film have the mental capacity of 12 year old boys.
Well kiddies, it’s not about the dialogue, which is sophomoric at best. It’s about buff hero Prince of Persia, Dastan (Jake Gyllenhaal) running around like crazy, jumping off buildings and engaging in endless sword fights with hordes of bad guys, dragging along a spiritual princess, Tamina (Gemma Arterton) to glory.
The story is right out “Aladdin” and “The Arabian Nights” adventure movies. Ben Kingsley portrays the evil scheming court advisor, Nizam. There is a supernatural subplot about a magical dagger that can turn back time.
As the action goes on continuously, ad nauseam, mature viewers will remember the Errol Flynn movies with the dashing pirate swinging his sword, dispatching his enemies and romancing the beautiful wenches at the island watering hole.
Newell’s total lack of subtlety leads to massive FX overkill. If he needed two scenes of action, he quadrupled it and had ten action scenes pieced together with Dastan looking more like Superman with his hairy chest showing. Viewers could almost assume that after Jake Gyllenhaal’s “Brokeback Mountain” gay cowboy adventure, this movie reestablishes his heterosexual macho image as a leading man.
The cheeky interaction between Tamina and Dastan as they wander out into the vast desert is an old movie cliche, in which the woman played hard to get, pretending to not like her potential lover, which built up the sexual tension. Then, when the Big Kiss happens, it’s orgasmic in scope.
Gemma Arterton, who played Strawberry Fields in the Bond film, “Quantum of Solace” is a fine actress who seems out of her element in the middle of the sword fighting action. Her everyday woman look is appealing to viewers used to actresses who use their beauty to offset their lack of acting skill.
At the heart of the story is the fortuitous way the Dastan became a Prince. As a boy, he was a commoner who was adopted by the king who observed the young man’s courage and athletic skill. He became a respected warrior in the king’s inner circle with his brothers. His destiny seems to involve his spiritual journey with Tamina.
The wily Nizam hatches a plot to steal the magic dagger and become king of the world. But, what he doesn’t know is: If he achieves his goal, he could end the world. Only Tamina can stop him with her special spiritual powers.
Dastan finds out that the dagger can thrust the holder back in time to fix mistakes or change events. So, the story is about the quest to protect the dagger and keep to out of the hands of power-mad Nizam.
Meanwhile, Dastan and Tamina fall into the hands of outlaws and have to fend off the Hassansins, a mysterious cult of assassins. These adventures delay their goal to reach the sacred mountain.
Yeah, it’s a fairytale with enough sword clashing and fight scenes to satisfy any 12 year old video game junkie.
Back to top
 Splice
Movie Review
By Rick Grant B+ Rated R
The central theme in this sci-fi turned horror film involves the consequences of messing with mother nature. The issues have been explored in many classic horror and sci-fi films such as Frankenstein, The Fly, Cipher, and other notable movies.
Co-writer/director Vincenzo Natali used recent developments in bio-science in a high tech setting to place his rebellious genetic scientists, who are also a couple, Clive (Adrien Brody) and Elsa (Sarah Polley).
These two genetic pathfinders believe that the quaint morality and ethics of today’s genetic experimentation can be circumvented to create human/animal hybrids to farm their unique proteins and other miracle chemicals.
The company funding the project wants results so they can finally make a profit from the byproducts of Clive and Elsa’s brilliant research. However, these genetic rebels want to go further into uncharted genetic territory, but the company will only fund they’re research if it produces patented products.
Ah yes, but they proceed anyway risking arrest and prison to develop a hybrid being–a new species. This leads them down a dark path to discovery and having to make difficult decisions.
Sci-fi and horror devotees will catch most of the references to other works, but there are many surprises that avoid cliches. Most notably, Natali has made a hip modern film using convincing high tech devices and plenty of cool looking computer programs that keep track of the genetic experiments.
Their hybrid being, Dren’s design is very realistic and a combination of live actress (Delphine Chaneac) CGI, and puppetry. Dren’s a dance of metaphors for life and how we as humans would react to alien beings landing on earth. She is continually evolving, changing. The human/CGI effects are seamless and hypnotic.
The scenario conjures up the alien abduction stories that have been investigated though regression hypnosis. Of course, this is controversial but the accounts are very similar to the premise of this film. The abuctees’ accounts suggest that the alien abductors are trying to create a human/alien hybrid.
As the story evolves, Clive and Elsa realize they are way over their heads in this experiment, which has become much more than a specimen study. Although there are some dark horror moments, Natali never lets the mood drift into cheesy horror. The script has a scientific overview featuring the two geneticists venturing into an alternate universe of genetic discovery, where unprecedented things happen.
Despite the far-out premise, Clive and Elsa’s emotions take over from their cold scientific study. When Clive and Elsa accepted the emotional well being of Dren, it translates as a metaphor for what it means to be human.
For Clive and Elsa, whatever the consequences of breaking all moral and ethical rules, they made a giant step in understanding gene manipulation. The film will make viewers think about the possibility of creating genetic hybrid beings and debate the moral issues involved.
Back to top
 Letters to Juliet
Movie Review
By Rick Grant B Rated PG
For screenwriters Jose Rivera and Tim Sullivan, coming up with a new twist on the cliche romantic comedy must have been difficult. However, they succeeded in creating an intriguing device to setup the romance as a feel-good fantasy.
Directed by Gary Winick, with ingenue de jour, Amanda Seyfried starring as the vulnerable Sophie, the picture moves at a steady pace as Sophie discovers her soulmate may not be her fiance,’ chef Victor (Gael Garcia Vernal). For reasons she can’t explain, she is detached from the magic of their love.
The two lovers travel to Italy so Victor can scout distributors for his new restaurant in NYC. He’s busy going to wine auctions and other food events. In contrast, Sophie is alone but strangely content to explore Italy’s sights.
Sophie and Victor end up in Verona and Victor is off again to find some rare truffles some distance away. While taking in the sights of Verona, Sophie come across the house that inspired Shakespeare’s “Romeo and Juliet.” There, on a wall, young women leave impassioned letters to the mythical Juliet.
Through some detective work, Sophie discovers a group of ladies who take the letters off the wall and answer them as Juliet. Intrigued by this unusual cadre of letter writers, Sophie joins the group with the intention of writing about it for her publication, “The New Yorker, where she is a facts checker. Of course, she aspires to be a journalist and this story may get her the job.
A turn of fortuitous events leads to a special letter received by Claire, (Vanessa Redgrave) an elderly lady who had left the letter on the wall behind a rock 50 years ago. Along with her grandson, Charlie, (Christopher Egan) the trio sets out to find Claire’s lost love. This odyssey takes them through the most scenic parts of Italy’s wine country in Tuscany.
By now, most viewers will have guessed where this skillfully shot romantic comedy is going. However, it’s a delightful journey that makes Sophie question her engagement to Victor, and derive great joy from helping this lady find a long lost love.
The search for lost loves is a powerful vehicle for tweaking the passions of women who always ask “what if” when thinking back to the ones that got away. Would Claire’s lost love even be alive? Would he be senile? It was a risky adventure.
Charlie was against the trip in the first place, claiming his grandmother couldn’t take the disappointment of leaning her lost love was dead. Nonetheless, Claire was determined to find out as a way to putting her past behind her.
Meanwhile, Victor seems to be in love with food and wine more than his fiancee. He’s in the Mecca of Italian cooking and he doesn’t care what Sophie does. This is a hint that there is a major problem in the relationship.
The script deals with a typical women’s fantasy of “how do they know when they have met their soul-mate?” Could it be the person they dumped years ago, or will they just know instinctively? Ah yes, the scenario revolves around the tragic story of Romeo and Juliet. This romantic premise titillates the female consciousness with the wonder of finding true love (before it goes bad).
In contrast, reality bites when a couple gets married and have children. Suddenly, romance has to be nurtured for it to work during the day-to-day struggles of life. Ah, but then women have these movies to refresh their belief in love conquers all. This is one of the better examples of this genre.
Back to top
 Iron Man 2
Movie Review
By Rick Grant B+ Rated PG-13 124 min
The sight of Mickey Rourke as Ivan Vanko a.k.a. Whiplash walking onto the live La Mans raceway with his plasma whips blazing and taking out race cars was a mind blowing scene. This brazen act began the intense action of this bold commercial IMAX 3D movie. Strap on your seat belts, this is an extreme ride.
Up until that point, Tony Stark a.k.a. Iron Man ( Robert Downey Jr.) was dying of battery toxins in his blood. He’d searched for a new element of which to build his battery power that wouldn’t produce toxins, but to no avail. Meanwhile, he promotes his personal assistant, Pepper Potts (Gwyneth Paltrow) to CEO so he can step down and prepare to die.
As his personal crisis deepens, Stark, is feeling the pressure by the U.S. government to share his technology with the military. At a hearing, presided over by a snide Senator Stern (Gary Shandling), he refuses share any of his present or future inventions with the U.S. military. He states that his private company has achieved what the government had never been able to pull off–world peace.
Ah, but back in Russia, another genius, Ivan Vanko (Rourke) is creating his own Iron Man weapon from plans left by his late physicist father. His technology is way ahead of Stark’s and he plans to sell his weapon to the highest bidder and wreak havoc on Western nations as revenge.
As it turns out, Stark’s nemesis, Justin Hammer (Sam Rockwell) breaks Vanko out of jail so he can develop his technology at Hammer’s company to sell to the U.S. military. However, bitter over his long incarceration in Russia, Vanko has other long range plans.
Stark is at the end of the road and hope. While watching an old film made by his father he figures out that his dad was trying to tell him that his plans for a permanent exposition was really disguised plans to create a new element that would power Stark’s Iron Man weapon indefinitely without harming his body.
Mickey Rouke as Ivan Vanko makes an imposing villain with his bulked up body, long hair, gold teeth, and heavily tattooed body which tells the story of his long incarceration in a Russian Gulag. He’s more than a match for Stark.
At Hammer’s high tech lab, Vanko makes a whole army of Iron Man-like drones for a military demonstration. What Hammer doesn’t know is Vanko controls the entire army with his special unhackable software program. Of course, this leads to a series of mind bending action scenes.
While Vanko is creating his weapons of mass destruction, Stark has fabricated the new element which has given him more power and vigor to run the Iron Man suit. But, Vanko has ominous plans to stage a terrorist act at Hammer’s demonstration in front of the military brass.
Back at Stark’s company, Pepper is having a hard time running the company without Stark’s input. She has hired a legal advisor, Natalie (Scarlett Johansson) to be her right hand. But Pepper doesn’t know that Natalie is a secret CIA agent sent to protect Stark’s interests.
When Stark returns, Pepper steps down and Stark retakes control of the company. Ah yes, but Stark is emotionally dependent on her and keeps her by his side.
As all hell breaks loose at the Hammer expo/demo show.
The scene featuring Scarlett Johansson kicking serious ass as a kung fu master spy, raises the testosterone level in the theater exponentially as men say to themselves, “I want one.” Johansson was in top shape to do these scenes and even got her widening butt under control.
Expertly directed by Jon Favreau with a strong influence from Stan Lee, of Marvel, the story, special effects, and skillful acting by the stellar cast combine to make this the adrenalin pumping summer film to see.
Downey and Paltrow have explosive chemistry together as Stark almost dies but comes back to reestablish Iron Man’s dominance and plant a wet kiss on Pepper’s lips. Oh, baby! Yeah,” Iron Man 2" is a wild ride at the movies.
Back to top
|
